A Near-Death "Chipotle" Experience

*Author's Note:  The narrative to this is a bit longer, but I find it quite funny.  If you'd rather just skip to the recipe, scroll down to the picture below and it follows.*

I came to the realization that I'm an impulsive meal-seeker last Winter when I almost died.  (That's dead in the literal sense by the way.)  Everyone gets food cravings from time to time, but most people aren't like me and will do the most ridiculously, stupid things to satisfy them.  Last winter, during the middle of the WORST blizzard that hit the Twin Cities in January, I craved Chipotle.  The craving hit me around 5:30pm after it had been snowing all day and it was already dark outside.  The snow was up over my tires so there was no way I was driving up to Burnsville that night.  I recall pacing my house as cabin fever slowly settled in.  Then the stupidity took place.  Allow me to transcribe the conversation between myself and my brain:

• Brain:  "...you know I'm not leaving you alone until I get my Chipotle."
• Self:  "Yeah, but the weather...I'm not going anywhere."
• Brain:  "Well....you know how to make it almost EXACTLY like they do.  What's the problem?"
• Self:  "I don't have the stuff..."
• Brain:  (Seizing control of my central nervous system - causing my body to turn towards the living room window and see the faint glow of Rainbow Foods across the street.)
• Self:  "What?....No way....I am not going to WALK there in this weather."
• Brain:  "I can make things very difficult for you, you know this, right?"
• Self:  "....I can't..."
• Brain:  "Oh that's right...you're out of shape....you can't hack it anymore.  Psh...you could do this all day 10 years ago."
• Self:  (Defensively) "Is that right?!...I'll show you..."

I quickly went to the closet to get my snow pants before I realized,  I have no snow pants.  Already this seems like a bad idea.  I went upstairs and turned on the weather channel in my room while I searched for my cargo pants waiting for that little blip in the bottom right corner to tell me the temperature.  It finally popped up...12.  "That's not too bad.."  I thought to myself.  As I was getting dressed, I also realized that I don't own a proper winter jacket.  (I know, I know...)  So, I put on a new tshirt, a long sleeve shirt and my hoodie with one more sweatshirt layered over.  In the back of my head, I kept picturing that scene from  the "K19: The Widowmaker" movie with Harrison Ford where the crew attempts to repair the radioactive core of the Russian submarine protected only with thin rain coats.  Nonetheless, I felt ready to tackle this obstacle in order to get me some Chipotle.  I tucked my pants into my boots and set off - pausing for a moment in front of the mirror to take note of how stupid I look.

I stepped outside and looked over at my destination - Rainbow Foods.  "Look at that....it's not that far.  Heck, I could probably throw a rock from here and hit the parking lot."  I thought to myself.  I started walking.  After walking what seemed like an eternity, I felt that uncomfortable burning in my thighs and legs.  I paused to catch my breath and looked around to see I was just past my driveway.  (I should point out at that I had my glasses on for this.  Another dumb move as I should have had my contacts in.) 

The sidewalks at my townhouse had been plowed about an hour or 2 earlier, so the snow was only about 4" deep making it a nuisance but not impassible.  I turned the corner in order to reach the main sidewalk that runs parallel to Cty. Road 50 only to find that it hadn't been plowed all day.  I took my first step and the snow went up to my knee.  I remember pausing to look up at the streetlight as my glasses fogged up with every breath.  I was almost at the halfway point so I had to keep going.  I trudged along, feeling the snow soaking my pants and running into my boots.  The more I walked, the more my body hurt - this was like navigating through quicksand. 

I made it to the Rainbow and pulled out my shopping list as I gasped for air and dripped sweat all over the floor.  After falling once from the melting snow under my boots, I started to shop. It was eerily quiet in there as only a stupid person would be out shopping in this mess.  I checked out, zipped up and headed off.  I checked my watch and calculated that it took me about 25 minutes to walk a block and a half.  When I got back to the sidewalk, I noticed that the holes in the snow my boots had left earlier were almost filled up already.  I stopped halfway up the path and looked around wondering what my neighbors must be thinking seeing this idiot out there carrying 2 bags of food.  This is the point where I believe I started to cry...

Halfway up the sidewalk was a large electrical box implanted in the ground for the townhouse.  I lumbered over, brushed it off and sat down.  Reality set in...I am going to die out here.  The first thing I thought was, "What are they going to tell my parents?"  I played it over in my head, "Yes, Mr. and Mrs. Grigal, we found your idiot of a son laying in the snow, 1/2 block from his house with a runny nose and two bags of groceries.  I do have good news though...the rice is still good, would you like it?"  My dad would probably take it.

My brain decided it had enough fun watching me in my misery and assisted in  releasing some adrenaline.  I panted and gasped and spit and cried all the way to my door where I slipped on the patch of ice under the snow there landing firmly on my back.  Nothing comes easy my friends...

I am a fan of Chipotle's Fajita Burrito...and I believe that the key to their success (in my opinion) is the way their rice prepared.  It is a perfect combination of white rice, cilantro, lime juice, and kosher salt.  The recipe below makes about 6 Grande Burritos.  I've broken down the components to this recipie below.  It may look intimidating due to the number of ingredients, but it's remarkably easy to prepare.

Ingredients:

Pico de' Gallo:

•  8 Roma Tomatoes
•  3/4 Red Onion
• 3/4 Red Pepper
• 2 Jalapenos (Remove seeds for less heat)
• 4 Cloves of Garlic
• 1/4 Cup Fresh Cilantro

Chicken Seasoning:

• 2 Tsp. Chili Powder
• 1 Tsp. Paprika
• 1 Tsp. Cumin
• 1 Tsp. Garlic Powder
• 1/2 Tsp. Kosher Salt
• 1/4 Tsp. Cayanne Pepper

Rice:

• 4-6 Cups Cooked White Rice
• 1/2 Cup Chopped Cilantro
• 2-3 Tsp. Kosher Salt (Or to taste)
• 1/2 Lime, squeezed for juice

Everything Else:

• 3 Medium Chicken Breasts, cut in 1" cubes
• 3/4 Cup Green Pepper, Sliced
• 3/4 Cup Yellow Onion, Sliced
• 2 Cups Romaine Lettuce, Sliced in strips
• 2 Cups Shredded Cheddar or Montery Jack Cheese
• 1 Cup Cooked Corn (Optional)
• 1 Package "Grande" Size Tortilla Shells at room temperature (I've only seen these by Aztec brand)
• Vegetable Oil

How to Make:

• Combine the elements of the pico de gallo in a bowl, mix well, cover and refrigerate.  While it's cooling, combine the elements for the chicken seasoning and sprinkle over cubed chicken.  Slice the green pepper and onion into 1/2" thick slices and set aside. 
• In a saute pan over medium heat, warm 2 Tbsp. Olive oil and add chicken, stirring to cook through.  As chicken is cooking, bring a second pan up to heat with the same amount of oil and add the peppers & onions, cooking until soft and fragrant.  While chicken and pepper/onion mixture are cooking, cook your rice in a sauce pan.  All items should be finishing up around the same time: 8-10 minutes.
• Once rice is cooked, remove from heat and add the cilantro, lime juice, and kosher salt - stir to incorporate.  Lay out a tortilla and scoop out a spoonful of rice in the center followed by a layer of chicken, pico, cheese and lettuce.  Wrap up and repeat with remaining tortillas.